Thursday, 28 July 2016

That was the holidays

That was the holidays
Remember that time when you went to the beach and your feet were burning in the boiling sand?
Remember going in a pitch black cave and you forgot your torch, you went on a track and you found a little shark; you tried to pull it’s tooth out?
That was the beach.

Remember that time you went to the movie’s and you went to see the BFG?
Remember the little girl went missing, she was was captured by a friendly giant in giant land?
That was the movies.

Remember going on a large white boat and caught a gigantic mutton snapper?
Remember diving down in the light blue sea and it went straight into a really dark blue?
That was fishing.

By Sean


  1. Wow Sean, this is fantastic writing! I love how descriptive it is, especially the dark cave section. Perhaps next time you could use your senses to add in more descriptions. How did you feel when you caught the snapper or when you were in the cave? What did the fish feel like?
    From Mrs Drake

  2. Well written Sean, you have used lots of good descriptions, gigantic, light blue,pitch black, boiling and I like how you have used captured instead of caught. This helps me as the reader to be able to visualise what you have written.
    I agree with Mrs Drake on your next steps. Keep up the great writing.
    Mrs Rowlands